New project: a first, in so many ways

Today, I’m here to talk about my new project, which is different from everything I have done until now and it has been making me really proud because it takes me out of my comfort zone.

For starters, it is a non-fiction book, which is, in itself, a first, since my passion is to construct imaginary stories, people and all sorts of events and reactions to them. But this one has no intention of entertaining, this book intends to make a statement and show people a different reality, all through the POV of one who is different.

I thought a lot before I, myself, could even accept that I should indeed write it. It would demand a lot of self exposure from me and I was afraid. But the truth is, there are other people out there who are also afraid, who are perhaps lost and I feel as though this book might help them.

Children, teenagers and even adults with Asperger’s Syndrome face many a hardship and difficulty along the way. I have what I can call, just a slight degree of Asperger’s, but I can certainly understand these situations better than the so-called normal people, if there even is such a thing as normal people.

I thought this might be a bad idea, since I can’t deal with the pity, curious eyes and confused looks, not even those that mean well, trying to be supportive. I don’t need support, I need understanding, so that people might leave me alone whenever that’s really all I need. I need peace of mind and a lot of personal space. Don’t we all?

And this is probably the main message of this book. We aren’t weird, we aren’t so different from all other people. We just have some additional challenges and difficulties dealing with frustration and crowds…

Every single thing around us, even the ones you can probably easily ignore because they aren’t important, we can’t. So we’re over-stimulated all the time. It causes headaches, dizziness and an overwhelming feeling that makes us want to scream aloud all the time. Sometimes, we feel like the world is trying to suffocate us. Are these descriptions so hard to understand? I wouldn’t think so, instead thinking it’d be just a matter of unfamiliarity and usually most of the things we don’t know, scare us… But then again, I don’t really know. I too, don’t walk in your shoes.

Still, I decided that I would be selfish if I could end up helping someone and I didn’t even try. I truly believe that reading this book will help not only the people with the syndrome (Asperger’s), but also those close to them, especially the parents, because sometimes, they are the ones who most need this help.

Since I became a mother, I have grown really understanding and supportive of parents. Any little thing, let alone some condition, is a worry, and Asperger’s Syndrome raises some tough questions about the future of the child. Will be my son or daughter become independent? Will he or she have a normal life? What’s going to happen when I leave this world? How will he or she survive?

These are the questions that most of the parents, myself included, sometimes ask themselves when looking at their sweet babies. So, I hope I’ll somewhat help in answering some of them and thus remove, or at least diminish, some lingering fears. Those terrible enemies of parenthood, fear and doubt.

The other big reason why this is a completely new project for me is because I’m writing it LIVE, as in, broadcasting myself, my workflow and thought process, all while writing the book and I’m doing it on twitch.tv.  It wasn’t an incredible new thought, actually I had already wanted to do something like this before, but never had the guts to go through with it. Yet, somehow this project sounded like a good idea to start holding my #writing_streams. That’s a new and exciting way of reaching people, allowing them to ask questions and share some fears, worries and experiences.

It’s a lot of work and I’m not sure about the final result of the whole experience, but if it ends up helping even one person, it’ll have been worth it.